Discworld MUD Wiki
Grammer Scorbic's Household Guard
Vital statistics
Guild Witches
Type Defensive
GP cost 50
Crystal N/A

Grammer Scorbic's Household Guard[]

Spell Description[]

This spell raises a common household utensil to float around the Witch, protecting her from blows in combat.

Costs and Components[]


Guild Primaries
  • Magic.Methods.Mental.Channelling
Other skills
  • Magic.Methods.Physical.Binding
  • Magic.Methods.Physical.Evoking

Times and Durations[]

Research needed. The floater will stay up until dislodged, which will happen after it gets hit during combat. (Better it than you.) Heavier items are harder to float, but stay up for longer (ie are resilient to more hits.)


May be learned from Granny Weatherwax
15 levels of Magic.Spells.Defensive
Focus tea research to be added to the talk page of this article


Cast Grammer Scorbic's Household Guard on <utensil>. The utensil doesn't have to be in your inventory, you can cast it straight from the ground.


  • Stacks with the bug shield.
  • When your floater gets knocked out of the air, it always lands on the ground, not in your inventory.
  • The utensil doesn't have to be in your inventory to cast it, you can cast it straight from the ground.
  • Research is needed on what skills affect how effective it is at blocking (ie frequency of swooping), how much damage it'll take before dropping out of the air, etc.
  • You might not necessarily want to go for the heaviest item you can get floated - lighter items fall down more easily but block more blows...
  • Common utensils to float are kitchen knives, flatiron, rolling pin, rice cooker - see here for a proper list.